What is important to me? What is important to other people? What is the most important thing of all? Love, happiness, growth, learning, nature, caring, food. (Oh yes, good food! ;-)) Being healthy. Peace. Freedom.
Yes, freedom is so important. In our world, today and here, we forget to value the freedom we actually have, the freedom to love whoever we want to, to be whoever we want to, to visit other countries, to work in other countries, to choose our career, to be healthy, to eat the food we want to eat and that is good for us, the freedom to dress how we want, to live our life in our own unique way, the freedom to go out on the streets every day, without having to worry about our safety.
So why don’t we LIVE all that? Why don’t we seize all that potential?
We can do ANYTHING. We can quit our job, go traveling, do whatever we want. Not everyone can do that, but SO MANY of us CAN. And we should ask ourselves if WE can, and respond honestly. The answer is usually YES. We can do so much more than what we allow ourselves to do. We are our own obstacle. We limit ourselves. Why do we do that?
And, yes, fucking YES, we can blame that on society and our conditioning, our childhood, all those beliefs that have made their way into our mind and soul. But if WE REALLY WANT TO we can do anything. Seriously.
I’m not saying that I know how to get to achieving what I really desire. But I know that I can. And I know that YOU can and that WE ALL can. It doesn’t matter whether it’s gardening or creating a project, building a community, drawing once a week, dancing or ANYTHING else. We can be big. We can change the world, we can make the world a better place. We’re afraid of being big, we’re afraid of being seen and we’re afraid of putting ourselves out there. We’re afraid of being judged. I am.
But is it really worth it, though? To trade our dreams for not being judged? Or to not even have the courage to desire because we’re too caught up in worrying about what others might think?
I DON’T THINK IT IS.
Change doesn’t just pop out of the ground. Change wants to be longed for, wants to be desired, change wants us to struggle for it.
So if we want something to be different – if we want to live our lives more fully, if we want the ocean to be clean, humans to be peaceful, animals to be respected, nature to be appreciated – we have to…
DARE TO DREAM.
Check out my new VISION PROJECT here.
Du willst etwas verändern. Du stehst klar für dein Ziel ein. Du möchtest deine Vision teilen.
Als Fotografin möchte ich dich darin unterstützen. Für Blog und Website können wir zusammen kraftvolle, ehrliche Fotos schaffen, um deine Vision in die Welt zu bringen. Wir können unseren Planeten zu einem Ort voll Liebe machen, voll Achtsamkeit und Offenheit, Klarheit, Nachhaltigkeit und was dein Herz begehrt.
Abhängig von deinem Projekt arbeite ich mit oder ohne Honorar oder auf Spendenbasis.
Mein Wunsch ist es, wichtige Gedanken und Ziele in der Gesellschaft zu verteilen. Deswegen, egal, was deine Passion, deine Vision, dein Lebensziel ist – wenn du fotografische Unterstützung brauchst, melde dich per E-Mail unter email@example.com oder direkt hier.
Mein Portfolio findest du hier und Weiteres auch auf Facebook: Luna Buerger Photography
Ich bin vor allem im Raum Freiburg und Berlin unterwegs, aber wenn du woanders lebst, können wir auch das organisieren!
Melde dich auch gern, falls du keine eigene Plattform hast, auf der du deine Ideen teilst. Sie sind es trotzdem wert, gesehen zu werden, weshalb ich sie gern mit unseren Fotos auf diesem Blog veröffentliche!
Für eine Welt, in der es zu leben wert ist!
(photo credit: Yeshi Choedon)
Meeting lots of great, interesting people, yummy food all the time, aromatic fruit, beautiful landscapes, friendly locals. To name only a few of all the expectations I had created before I left. Yes, I knew that there would be annoying things, stress, getting lost and feeling lost, and maybe lonely sometimes.
There is one thing that made it worth it to have had all those expectations – and have been disappointed. Every single expectation that turned out to not match reality made me learn to let go of expectations just a millimeter more, sometimes even a centimeter. So did my expectation of Mui Ne. Beautiful white beach, nice sand, blue water, palm trees. Reality was this: Plastic and broken fisher nets on the beach and in the water. All kinds of other garbage. Dead jellyfish and starfish, crabs, and little fish that weren’t useful for the fishermen and women. The water was rather brown than blue, because the water was very shallow so the waves stirred up all the sand. During the day, the high tide made the beach very narrow, only in the morning there was more space to take a walk by the beach. All in all, the beach was pretty stinky and not so dreamlike as one could have wished.
So, lesson No. 1 was letting go of my expectations, not creating specific ideas. I learned another thing, though, which is accepting and enjoying what is there, even when I had different expectations. One day, i got up early in the morning for sunrise and the light was just stunningly beautiful. I took photos and picked hundreds of colorful shells. I felt like a little kid who couldn’t stop looking at the ground, pick a shell, and, oh! – another one, so beautiful, and over there, one that has the colors of a sunset.
What I could not ignore was the plastic. It made me so sad. There’s a beach on the other side of the world, and it could be fantastic, paradisiacal. But instead it’s full of waste. What are we doing to this planet? To the ocean, the plants, the animals, ourselves. Mui Ne is famous for its sea food and fish, but honestly, after seeing the locals pick the edible fish out of a pile of jellyfish, tiny fish, and SO MUCH plastic, I wouldn’t want to eat that stuff (even if I wasn’t vegetarian). Apart from the fact that a great number of animals die for a single crab or bigger fish – they’re just thrown away or left at the beach as bycatch. There must be so much plastic in the sea food, little particles that humans ingest by eating the animals there – and not only there. Plastic is flooding the oceans, the whole planet.
Endlessly bubbling words in one moment, silence in another. Not typing any word.
The longer I stop writing, the harder it gets. The more perfectionist I get, the more doubts I have, the less I know how to unite single words to a harmonious group.
I’m home, and the five weeks of traveling feel like a weird dream to me now. You wake up, and you wonder, what was that all about? What did you do? You just stumbled through those odd events until you awoke.
When I wrote “The Right Decision” at the beginning of November, I had made up my mind to go back to Germany and already booked my flight. I’d be traveling through Vietnam for 6 weeks and get back on December 12. I was happy with my decision, it felt good to have some time to explore the country. When I got to Mui Ne on November 8, I stayed at a hostel by the beach, surrounded by other backpackers. I wouldn’t have expected to feel weird and out of place in their company after just a single week of living with locals, but I did.
And then I got sick. Tonsillitis. Thankfully, I could stay with a woman I had met in Saigon: Yen, her Belgian husband Pieter and her son Antoine (a very cute, very lively little monkey). I had healthy food (finally lots of greens, vegetables, smoothies and the tastiest honey I had ever tried – fresh jungle honey!), a clean bathroom, a large bed, a kettle to make ginger tea and most of what I needed to take care of myself. But I felt lonely, and homesick and pretty shitty. And at some point, I asked myself, what am I doing here any longer? Nothing is flowing, I never really feel happy, I’m not enthusiastic. The thought of returning to Europe earlier began taking shape. But I wasn’t sure if I was feeling that way due to tonsillitis or because the tonsillitis just made obvious what was already there. Some talking to my friends and my mum helped me settle for No. 2 and I did the craziest thing I had done in a while. I rebooked my flight so I would leave Asia just a couple days after. I felt as alive as I hadn’t in quite a long time.
I realized that for a long time I had just been waiting. Waiting to meet someone I would really connect with, waiting for the next place to be very beautiful, waiting for my expectations to turn into reality. But most of all, waiting to return back home and see all the people I love. I remembered the blog post I wrote before I left, “Waiting for the Here and Now”. It’s about how much time we actually spend waiting for something and how I don’t want to do that. Traveling on my own made me learn how tough it can be to implement that. Another thing I learned, though, is that refusing to wait and instead actually enjoying the moment is not always just about changing your attitude. It is in many cases, but sometimes it also means to change your environment. You can’t always do that, that’s when you can only alter your thinking about the situation you’re in, but when you can and you feel like that’s what you need to do in order to end the waiting, that’s what needs to be done.
“The Only Truth Is the Ever-New Impermanent Nature.”, a quote that accompanied me the past week.
Now it’s your turn to guess where I’ve spent my last week…
I was staying at Thabarwa Nature Center in Ho Chi Minh City, a Vipassana meditation center. I had found the place on Workaway, like the school I volunteered at in Cambodia. For those who don’t know, Workaway is a platform to find a place to work and receive food, accommodation and local culture in exchange. And this time, it was a total joy.
I tought English, but it wasn’t at all like last time. I only tought 1-2 hours a day, was free to choose how I wanted to teach my class, the students were all adults (mostly middle-aged or older), and at the beginning of my week I just had a single student. The number gradually rose and yesterday it was four. Teaching those people was the best evidence that so often age doesn’t matter – just in case I had still been in doubt. After teaching a 60-year-old woman “Itsy Bitsy Spider” while drawing little images to explain the lyrics there’s no way of questioning it.
And the people living in the center were so caring, it was such a pleasure to be with them. Even though I didn’t understand their words when they were talking at the kitchen table, sometimes I could guess what the conversation was about. For example when Binh’s daughter didn’t want to eat the greens, trying very hard to find excuses… 😉 Binh was the man I contacted on Workaway and he was very supportive all the time. Although I felt lonely in some moments, this was a beautiful place to be in. After every single meal that wasn’t just fruit for breakfast, I was so damn full. The food was too delicious. In the first couple of days I learned to enjoy dragon fruits which I had thought I didn’t like. Weirdly, big ones are sweeter than small ones… Here – not imported and picked when still unripe – they’re really yummy. And their color is amazing!
I also learned more about Vipassana meditation, a Buddhist meditation that is not tied to religion, though. The meditation is about awareness and mindfulness. It’s about understanding the nature of things, mostly of our thoughts and feelings. Teachers of Vipassana meditation believe that every thought and every feeling is impermanent; they come and go. And when we sit down to meditate we close our physical eyes and open our inner eye instead. We watch our mind, we observe what we think and how we feel. We don’t reject any of our thoughts and feelings, neither do we attach to them. The word Theravada monks use to describe that state of mind is Equanimity. But the practice doesn’t end as soon as you open your eyes and get up. You practice mindfulness in every moment. Alone or when you’re with others. Quiet or in conversation. Still or in movement. Sitting, lying, standing.
It was very interesting to learn about this kind of meditation, also because meditation is such a fuzzy word. People talk about meditation, but everone has their own idea or imaginations about it, and there are so many different ways to practice it. When someone says he is meditating every day, you have no idea what that person is actually doing.
And I agree with most of the aspects that Vipassana (or Theravada) meditation is about. I resonate with the idea of neither attaching nor rejecting your feelings. Too often and too easily we try to hold on to a feeling we label as nice and beautiful – and try to suppress our so-called negative emotions. We want to feel happiness and joy, but we hate feeling impatient or sad or lazy. I think it’s a very healthy – and, if that word is appropriate, effective – way to deal with the ocean of our mind. Because it is, really, an ocean. Our emotions are like waves, and every feeling will pass at some point. Trying not to feel it or push it away won’t help and maybe even cause it to linger longer. I have experienced it; when you just observe your feeling with an imaginary internal camera, as Binh’s wife explained to me – meaning, you allow yourself to feel, and just watch what’s happening to your emotion, your body, your mind – the feeling will pass. “The only truth is the ever-new impermanent nature.”